Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only site on the Internet that I know of devoted to all things related to Un(an actual person and not the United Nations, which has it's own website). It's time for one of those updates.
I've been asking people that I know (those who attend law school) what they would have done if they didn't attend law school. Most of them answered by stating that they would have went to graduate school and gotten a masters/doctorate degree. One professor I asked mentioned that he would have been a bartender on a Caribbean island. Honestly. It was the coolest answer I've gotten and quite possibly, one of the more interesting answers I'v heard.
Me, I probably would have went to graduate school and gotten a doctorate in some subject like English and pursued an academic career like being a professor. Not the most interesting thing, but suitable for my personality type (ITSJ on the MBTI). I sometimes think I would have been much happier if I had not pursued the law school path of life. Much happier.
It's not that I absolutely hate law school (I find some aspects to be amazingly idiotic. It reminds me of a "grown-up" version of high school, but a lot more expensive.), but being the "future lawyer" of my family, I'm the new source of legal help.
My mother will watch The People's Court or Dateline or 48 Hours and ask me questions on why certain things were ruled in a certain way. Because I'm in law school, I should "obviously" know the answer, despite not having learned much, if any, about the topic in law school. Answering such a question would require doing some research. But I'm "supposed" to know the answer. Despite my best efforts in explaining this, she considers my answer to be a sign of laziness at studying and not putting enough effort into law school. Maybe I'm not looking at this from the proper perspective, but it still drives me fucking insane. Despite my best efforts in trying to stay calm while explaining this, I inevitably lose my temper (which happens a lot and with great fury) and start screaming at her. It's not the best way to deal with this, but every time she asks me a question, she has to ask it multiple times as she did not remember the answer I gave her or she did not understand a certain phrase I used, despite breaking it down into one syllable works that a child could understand. All because I am a damn law school student, I'm supposed to know every damn detail and every fucking rule of law. I absolutely hate it.
Then she will go and pull out the guilt-trip card (the "you should be nice to people and not yell at me). God forbid that my father or my sister will be around, as they will do the same thing. I hate it. Then I feel guilty about yelling at her, despite knowing that as a law school student, it is impossible to know why certain things are done in certain ways without doing some research. You only get a basic idea of why things are done, but this is limited to certain topics that the law school merits as worthy of teaching. She always mentions that "I'll have to deal with people nicely." That is true. But, as a law school student, it's not as satisfying as saying "If you really want to know, then ask a lawyer." She's now learned (up to a point) that asking me these questions is something that will drive me up the wall and become potentially violent. Which now applies to many other situations like asking me questions of any sort unless it requires answers of "yes" and "no" and "maybe." So I have anger management issues and she thinks that she was a bad parent for not trying to connect with me as a child. I don't think she was a bad parent considering what was going on at the time.
It's now gotten to the point where I am now going to be the source of legal help for the family once I graduate. I've been "blessed" with the great responsibility of solving legal problems when they arise, assuming I stay in Kansas. It is very tempting to just get the hell out of Kansas as soon as fucking possible...like to California or anywhere that requires at least two days of driving time. I might even get an unlisted phone number, leave out any mention of an address, and change my e-mail address. It's gotten to that point.
I love my mom, but this is driving me insane. At this moment, I sometimes look back and think that I should have never even thought about becoming a lawyer and attending law school. I hate it. I absollutely hate it.
That's all for now.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Friday, April 28, 2006
The Same Ol' Situation
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the semi-regularly updated site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for one of those updates that people of a certain personality type read on a regular basis.
Lately, I feel like, to quote from Motley Crue (can't get the damn umlauts to show up), "It's the same ol,' same ol' situation. It's the same ol', same ol' ball and chain." I fell like I'm living the same day over and over again, just like Groundhog Day on an eternal spin cycle. Just like "Ants Marching" sung by Dave Matthews:
Iron Maiden also explains this well. I've got the strange feeling I've done this before:
Just like the song by Madness, "Tomorrow's Just Another Day" and it never seems to end. Same thing over and over again:
If I'm not bored out of my mind living this life, I wonder if this is even right for me. I wonder why am I in law school. i've been wondering for the longest time. I don't know if I'm going to be happy with this path and that's scary...at least for me. To use John Mayer's "Why, Georgia Why":
All of this is making me want to take the following miracle drug (it's a joke but I wish it was real)
That's all for now.
Lately, I feel like, to quote from Motley Crue (can't get the damn umlauts to show up), "It's the same ol,' same ol' situation. It's the same ol', same ol' ball and chain." I fell like I'm living the same day over and over again, just like Groundhog Day on an eternal spin cycle. Just like "Ants Marching" sung by Dave Matthews:
He wakes up in the morning
Does his teeth bite to eat and he’s rolling
Never changes a thing
The week ends the week begins
Iron Maiden also explains this well. I've got the strange feeling I've done this before:
When you see familiar faces,
But you don't remember where they're from,
Could you be wrong?
When you've been particular places,
That you know you've never been before,
Can you be sure?
'Cause you know this has happened before,
And you know that this moment in time is for real,
And you know when you feel Deja vu.
Chorus:
Feel like I've been here before,
Feel like I've been here before.
Ever had a conversation,
That you realise you've had before,
Isn't it strange?
Have you ever talked to someone,
And you feel you know what's coming next?
It feels pre-arranged.
'Cause you know that you've heard it before,
And you feel that this moment in time is surreal,
'Cause you know when you feel deja-vu
Just like the song by Madness, "Tomorrow's Just Another Day" and it never seems to end. Same thing over and over again:
Listened long, tried to take it in
All these facts leave me in the swim
It’s down and down there is no up
I think that I’ve run out of luck.
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them saying
And it gets better every day
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
Tomorrow’s just another... day
Walking now, over covered ground
There is a chance if I move around
I need a moment to reflect
On the friendships I have wrecked.
Why is it i, don’t I always try ?
I hear them say
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them say
And it gets better every day
I hear them say
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them say
And it gets better every day
I heard them say
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them say
Tomorrow’s just another day
Tomorrow’s just another...
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them saying
And it gets better every day
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
If I'm not bored out of my mind living this life, I wonder if this is even right for me. I wonder why am I in law school. i've been wondering for the longest time. I don't know if I'm going to be happy with this path and that's scary...at least for me. To use John Mayer's "Why, Georgia Why":
But all I feel’s alone
It might be a quarter-life crisis
Or just the stirring in my soul
Either way
I wonder sometimes
About the outcome
Of a still verdictless life
Am I living it right
Am I living it right
Am I living it right
Why, why georgia, why
So what so I’ve got a smile on
It’s hiding the quiet superstitions in my head
Don’t believe me
Don’t believe me
When I say I’ve got it down
Everybody is just a stranger
But that’s the danger in going my own way
I guess it’s a price I have to pay
Still everything happens for a reason
Is no reason not to ask myself
If I’m living it right
Am I living it right
Am I living it right
All of this is making me want to take the following miracle drug (it's a joke but I wish it was real)
That's all for now.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Finals Are Coming...
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the site for all things related to Un. It's time for another update, making it three in a row, all on consecutive days. Oh, the joy of being consistently consistent with updating this blog instead of consistently inconsistent or maybe inconsistently consistent. I digress.
It's that time of the year again. A little more than one week before the semester is over and that means one thing...the dreaded law school finals. And I have a very, how does one say this politely, bad final schedule. I have a final on a Saturday (Business Associations II), two on Monday (Payment Systems and Land Transactions), and two on Tuesday--the next day (International Economic Law and Professional Responsibility). Having two finals on the same day should make for a real mind-screwing when they are on two totally unrelated topics. Nothing like four tests in two days. For some strange reason, I have a knack this semester for picking classes with atrocious scheduling. This should make for a very fun finals period. I should be thankful that I'll have lots of time to prepare for the onslaught. No prom dinners in the law school or any other noisy social event sprung upon unsuspecting students. Though one of the many variations of Murphy's Law might come into play. With the weather right now and how unpredictable (normal for Kansas) it's been, I wouldn't be surprised if something happened like a thunderstorm cutting off power during the middle of a final...
Then again, when I was an undergrad, I once suffered from the same situation, but the finals were a whole lot easier, unlike the hell that law school finals are. Law school finals, unlike finals as a normal college student, are a different breed of test. Those formerly and currently in law school should know what I am talking about. They make a person, after seeing the grade one received, curse the entire law school experience of "mandatory curves" and "grade distribution." It's no wonder that law school students and lawyers go into drinking and become "functioning alcoholics". I digress again.
Well, that' all I've got to say about finals, which, in the end, didn't amount to much. I think I might study for my finals. I think.
That's all for now.
It's that time of the year again. A little more than one week before the semester is over and that means one thing...the dreaded law school finals. And I have a very, how does one say this politely, bad final schedule. I have a final on a Saturday (Business Associations II), two on Monday (Payment Systems and Land Transactions), and two on Tuesday--the next day (International Economic Law and Professional Responsibility). Having two finals on the same day should make for a real mind-screwing when they are on two totally unrelated topics. Nothing like four tests in two days. For some strange reason, I have a knack this semester for picking classes with atrocious scheduling. This should make for a very fun finals period. I should be thankful that I'll have lots of time to prepare for the onslaught. No prom dinners in the law school or any other noisy social event sprung upon unsuspecting students. Though one of the many variations of Murphy's Law might come into play. With the weather right now and how unpredictable (normal for Kansas) it's been, I wouldn't be surprised if something happened like a thunderstorm cutting off power during the middle of a final...
Then again, when I was an undergrad, I once suffered from the same situation, but the finals were a whole lot easier, unlike the hell that law school finals are. Law school finals, unlike finals as a normal college student, are a different breed of test. Those formerly and currently in law school should know what I am talking about. They make a person, after seeing the grade one received, curse the entire law school experience of "mandatory curves" and "grade distribution." It's no wonder that law school students and lawyers go into drinking and become "functioning alcoholics". I digress again.
Well, that' all I've got to say about finals, which, in the end, didn't amount to much. I think I might study for my finals. I think.
That's all for now.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
The Noise at KU Law
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the regularly updated site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for one of those updates that generally occur on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays, with sporadic updates on the other days of the week.
I arrive at KU Law School really early, like around 7:20 AM, give or take a few minutes. For some reason, I am crazy (possibly dumb) enough to take classes that begin at 8:30 AM on most days of the week. But I make use of that time by reading newspapers, demolishing the New York Times and Wall Street Journal (on Fridays) crossword puzzles, and surfing the Internet when the library opens. It's quite nice as it's probably the only time when the law school is quiet.
Or so it has been until about two weeks ago. Let the griping begin...as there is always something here to annoy me at the law school. It used to be the lousy HVAC system that broke down and caused Green Hall to heat up to a preposterous temperature. It used to be the Internet service that went out every so often. The debacle called the Informal Commons renovation that still has a few bugs like the microwave oven that randomly sparks and sends out noxious smoke. And so it goes. Now it's the weird noises that start at exactly 7:30 AM.
Recently, I've noticed at 7:30 each morning for the past two weeks, there has been this really strange noise. It's a peculiar grinding/clanking sound. I'm not sure what it is, but it is really annoying and really loud.
It's most likely the pipes leading to the semi-functioning water fountains located by the first-floor elevator. Which reminds me of some other stuff that doesn't work at the law school and could be fixed. The water from the water fountains is of very questionable quality and color. It sometimes looks and tastes chalky (which happens at Wescoe often). Or it looks fine, but tastes rusty or metallic (don't drink the water at Lindley or Learned if you don't like metallic tasting water). I'm hoping there aren't any other reasons to question the water quality on campus...
I suspect that it most likely the water fountain for several logical reasons. One, they rarely work properly and two, the water fountains on the third floor make that same noise on certain occasions. Sometimes, I want to kick the water fountains just to stop the noise. Hey, if that doesn't work, it at least provides a conduit for letting out aggression.
That's all for now.
I arrive at KU Law School really early, like around 7:20 AM, give or take a few minutes. For some reason, I am crazy (possibly dumb) enough to take classes that begin at 8:30 AM on most days of the week. But I make use of that time by reading newspapers, demolishing the New York Times and Wall Street Journal (on Fridays) crossword puzzles, and surfing the Internet when the library opens. It's quite nice as it's probably the only time when the law school is quiet.
Or so it has been until about two weeks ago. Let the griping begin...as there is always something here to annoy me at the law school. It used to be the lousy HVAC system that broke down and caused Green Hall to heat up to a preposterous temperature. It used to be the Internet service that went out every so often. The debacle called the Informal Commons renovation that still has a few bugs like the microwave oven that randomly sparks and sends out noxious smoke. And so it goes. Now it's the weird noises that start at exactly 7:30 AM.
Recently, I've noticed at 7:30 each morning for the past two weeks, there has been this really strange noise. It's a peculiar grinding/clanking sound. I'm not sure what it is, but it is really annoying and really loud.
It's most likely the pipes leading to the semi-functioning water fountains located by the first-floor elevator. Which reminds me of some other stuff that doesn't work at the law school and could be fixed. The water from the water fountains is of very questionable quality and color. It sometimes looks and tastes chalky (which happens at Wescoe often). Or it looks fine, but tastes rusty or metallic (don't drink the water at Lindley or Learned if you don't like metallic tasting water). I'm hoping there aren't any other reasons to question the water quality on campus...
I suspect that it most likely the water fountain for several logical reasons. One, they rarely work properly and two, the water fountains on the third floor make that same noise on certain occasions. Sometimes, I want to kick the water fountains just to stop the noise. Hey, if that doesn't work, it at least provides a conduit for letting out aggression.
That's all for now.
Monday, April 24, 2006
A Night at Baylor Law School Library...
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only site (at least the only one that I know of) on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for a Monday morning update.
I admit that I've made many comments about law school on this blog and in The Brief-Brief, but every so often, I find something that puts everything back into a more complementary perspective about everything. At least our interim Dean isn't like the law school dean over at Baylor University, home of a former men's basketball coach who was lying scum and tried to protray a murder victim as a drug dealer just to save his butt.
And what has inspired this temporary change of heart? At least the administration at KU Law School, despite being ranked #70 in the US News rankings, has the common sense not to schedule noisy events during finals period or to close down the law school libraty so his son could host a pre-prom dinner party. Yes, a prom party in a law school library. During finals period. I'm not sure why anyone would want to host anything in a law school library, but after seeing some pictures of their library, it is quite attractive and aesthetically pleasing site:
Of course, some of the parents involved in this effort thought that the law school students who complained were whiny and suggested that they could study somewhere else in the library. After all, according to their "logic", it was only temporary (four hours) and only "half" of the law school library was shut down. Brilliant logic, but NOISE travels.
Then again, this would never happen at the KU School of Law as the the library isn't that good looking...just like the other law schools around the nation built in the concrete-box style.
That's all for now.
I admit that I've made many comments about law school on this blog and in The Brief-Brief, but every so often, I find something that puts everything back into a more complementary perspective about everything. At least our interim Dean isn't like the law school dean over at Baylor University, home of a former men's basketball coach who was lying scum and tried to protray a murder victim as a drug dealer just to save his butt.
And what has inspired this temporary change of heart? At least the administration at KU Law School, despite being ranked #70 in the US News rankings, has the common sense not to schedule noisy events during finals period or to close down the law school libraty so his son could host a pre-prom dinner party. Yes, a prom party in a law school library. During finals period. I'm not sure why anyone would want to host anything in a law school library, but after seeing some pictures of their library, it is quite attractive and aesthetically pleasing site:
Of course, some of the parents involved in this effort thought that the law school students who complained were whiny and suggested that they could study somewhere else in the library. After all, according to their "logic", it was only temporary (four hours) and only "half" of the law school library was shut down. Brilliant logic, but NOISE travels.
“I study on the first floor of the library regularly . . . and I can hear clapping and a constant buzz through the earplugs I use,” Duesler said. “There is also a lot of traffic in and out, the high school kids and their parents.”After getting complaints from faculty and students and after the event occurred, the law school dean came to the shocking conclusion that it was an amazingly idiotic decision on his part. Not that studying for finals really matters, especially when it's your son who wants to use the building. A quote from an article describing this mess. Please note that the material in brackets was not part of the original article and were inserted by the blogger:
For his part, Toben, who was in Dallas for a dinner Saturday night, acknowledged the concerns of students and some faculty, and apologized for the decision...
“I have come to the conclusion that my judgment in this matter . . . was poor,” [as if that wasn't obvious when the suggestion was made] Toben said via cell phone. “I have discerned [um...common sense?] very clearly [after hearing complaints and getting this story in the newspaper] that some of my students and one or more of my colleagues are very upset about the use of this space, especially during exam time. They are right.”
“I am very sorry for this, and I apologize, and I understand that I have no doubt lost the confidence of many [obvious], and I will move forth accordingly [like give up the dean position],” the law school dean said.
Then again, this would never happen at the KU School of Law as the the library isn't that good looking...just like the other law schools around the nation built in the concrete-box style.
That's all for now.
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Office Supply Store in a Backpack
Greetings and welcome back to the Un-Zone, the semi-regularly updated site still on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. Or at least stuff that this blogger personally finds interesting.
I've generally operated on the idea of "Be prepared," though I've never been a Boy Scout. With law school however, this idea has slowly degenerated into "Be prepared only if it's your day to answer questions in class." It's amazing how quickly this has happened, but I digress. I also have a tendency when it comes to maintaining a certain level of cleanliness, though it used to be almost OCD-ish when I was much younger, like before highschool, which seems like a while ago. I digress. It tends to happen a lot.
One day, during Land Transactions (where I seem to pull out brilliant answers out of nowhere), the Professor passed a handout which corrected one of the many errors rife in the supplement due to careless editing. What better way to keep organized by stapling this "correction sheet" to the page it belonged in the Supplement? So I pulled out a mini-stapler from my backpack and stapled it to the page. Nothing weird with that...right? I hand the stapler to the person sitting next to me and he looks at me funny. So I carry a stapler with me.
I've always carried a stapler with me during college as I wrote a bunch of papers for my classes and there was never a stapler around in the classroom when it was time to turn stuff in. I was an English and History major. So I began to carry a mini-stapler with me (along with a box of staples) so I would have one...just in case. You never know when a stapler will be handy, which it did. I got bonus points for being the staple-packing savior on a day when NOBODY stapled their ten-page reearch papers (except for me). I've gotten other things (much better than bonus points) because I've carried that stapler with me. That's another post. No pickup lines were involved.
Along the same lines, I carry several pencils with me (both mechanical and regular) because if I run out of mechanical pencil lead, I have something else to write with. I also carry a pencil-sharpener also (for obvious reasons). I also carry several pens because if the pencils don't work, I have something to write with. Whiteout? Check. Notebook paper? Check. Legal pad paper? Check. Graph paper? Check. Calculator? Highlighers? Protractor? Ruler? Eraser? USB Flash Memory? Floppy disk? Black's Law Dictionary, pocket sized? Newspapers? I've got it somewhere in my backpack. I possess a miniature office supply store in there.
I might not be prepared, but I might just be a packrat who has this stuff in my backpack as I am too lazy to take it out. There's a very good possibility that is true. But it does come in handy. If I need a stapler or a calculator or an extra pencil, I can be confident in knowing that I already have one in possession. You never know when you'll need something.
So if you ever are in Green Hall and you need a stapler and one isn't handy, you now know where to go.
That's all for now.
I've generally operated on the idea of "Be prepared," though I've never been a Boy Scout. With law school however, this idea has slowly degenerated into "Be prepared only if it's your day to answer questions in class." It's amazing how quickly this has happened, but I digress. I also have a tendency when it comes to maintaining a certain level of cleanliness, though it used to be almost OCD-ish when I was much younger, like before highschool, which seems like a while ago. I digress. It tends to happen a lot.
One day, during Land Transactions (where I seem to pull out brilliant answers out of nowhere), the Professor passed a handout which corrected one of the many errors rife in the supplement due to careless editing. What better way to keep organized by stapling this "correction sheet" to the page it belonged in the Supplement? So I pulled out a mini-stapler from my backpack and stapled it to the page. Nothing weird with that...right? I hand the stapler to the person sitting next to me and he looks at me funny. So I carry a stapler with me.
I've always carried a stapler with me during college as I wrote a bunch of papers for my classes and there was never a stapler around in the classroom when it was time to turn stuff in. I was an English and History major. So I began to carry a mini-stapler with me (along with a box of staples) so I would have one...just in case. You never know when a stapler will be handy, which it did. I got bonus points for being the staple-packing savior on a day when NOBODY stapled their ten-page reearch papers (except for me). I've gotten other things (much better than bonus points) because I've carried that stapler with me. That's another post. No pickup lines were involved.
Along the same lines, I carry several pencils with me (both mechanical and regular) because if I run out of mechanical pencil lead, I have something else to write with. I also carry a pencil-sharpener also (for obvious reasons). I also carry several pens because if the pencils don't work, I have something to write with. Whiteout? Check. Notebook paper? Check. Legal pad paper? Check. Graph paper? Check. Calculator? Highlighers? Protractor? Ruler? Eraser? USB Flash Memory? Floppy disk? Black's Law Dictionary, pocket sized? Newspapers? I've got it somewhere in my backpack. I possess a miniature office supply store in there.
I might not be prepared, but I might just be a packrat who has this stuff in my backpack as I am too lazy to take it out. There's a very good possibility that is true. But it does come in handy. If I need a stapler or a calculator or an extra pencil, I can be confident in knowing that I already have one in possession. You never know when you'll need something.
So if you ever are in Green Hall and you need a stapler and one isn't handy, you now know where to go.
That's all for now.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Campus Scenery
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the kind-of-regularly updated site on the Information Highway complete with references to all things Un. It's kind of like the tourist traps on lesser-known highway exits that bilk you out of money, but this time, it's actually worth going to. Only because of the strage curiousity that compels you to watch stuff like that. Anyways...
The following may be considered one of the less politically correct posts on this website, as well as one that might offend those with more "liberated" tastes, as in the modern "everyone is beautiful" school of thought. You know, the "beauty is subjective" people.
To begin, the Onion used to have an article making fun of the phenomenom that occurs at college campuses when the weather gets warmer, as in spring and summer. Ah yes, that ritual of warm weather...the increased exposure of breasts and other body parts covered up during the winter. I told you, this article was going into such topics. It's not on the Onion website, but several blogs have preserved this article. It's a great article as it inflates language into preposterous sounding academic tripe:
Which, at the University of Kansas, happens quite often during the spring and summer. Just look at the Free For All in the University Daily Kansan and you'll find one of two comments about this display.
This brings me to the point of this post. When an in general, quite pleasurable display, well, becomes eye-pollution and should be banned before other people cause accidents. Not because of stunning beauty but sheer ugliness. A fashion designer once said about the wrong people wearing miniskirts: "Never has so little been raised so much to show too much that should not be shown." You probably know where this is going to...
That said, while driving home, I stopped at a four-way stop on Naismith by Robinson and Allen Fieldhouse. The usual parade of females exhibiting their warm-weather "wardrobe" (if it can be called that) was crossing the street. Not too bad. Then along came a female with more rolls than a bakery wearing a halter top and I believe, short-shorts. Not a pretty sight. Certain people should not wear tight-fitting clothes or clothing that exposes large amounts of flesh. I know that it was eighty-something today, but that wasn't exactly the best thing for her to wear or for anyone to see. Nobody wants to see that. I'm not the most fashionable person, but I know what clothing I should wear as not to offend people with sights they do not want to particularly look at or cause people to want to shut their eyes and vomit.
At that moment, I kind of wished that the weather wasn't so warm. Either that or this person wore some more flattering clothing. Whoever came up with the maxim of "Don't judge a person by their cover" must have been deluding themself. They probably saw stuff they didn't want to see.
That's all for now.
The following may be considered one of the less politically correct posts on this website, as well as one that might offend those with more "liberated" tastes, as in the modern "everyone is beautiful" school of thought. You know, the "beauty is subjective" people.
To begin, the Onion used to have an article making fun of the phenomenom that occurs at college campuses when the weather gets warmer, as in spring and summer. Ah yes, that ritual of warm weather...the increased exposure of breasts and other body parts covered up during the winter. I told you, this article was going into such topics. It's not on the Onion website, but several blogs have preserved this article. It's a great article as it inflates language into preposterous sounding academic tripe:
“At schools in warmer climates, the vast quantities of breasts tend to take on a diminished significance, because of overexposure,” says Professor Hiram Milchan of the Hebraic Studies department of the Greater Miami Divinity School. “The campus populace tends to become jaded toward breasts, as they are nearly always visible even to a casual onlooker.”
Pointing out his office window at an impromptu dormyard game of bikini volleyball, Milchan adds, “This does not move me. The undulating,the bouncing, the firm upraised globes leaping skyward, then back downagain with a resounding bounce–all of this has become com monplace here in Florida.”
Milchan went on to explain that in northern climes, the ebb and flow of the seasons creates a corresponding ebb and flow of breast visibility. At the University of Wisconsin and other northern universities possessing lengthy winters and a left-leaning, socially liberal student body, the recent preponderance of breast displays has brought student traffic to near-gridlock, with heterosexual males and both closeted and out lesbians gawking at the near-unbelievable levels of mammarian visibility.
Which, at the University of Kansas, happens quite often during the spring and summer. Just look at the Free For All in the University Daily Kansan and you'll find one of two comments about this display.
This brings me to the point of this post. When an in general, quite pleasurable display, well, becomes eye-pollution and should be banned before other people cause accidents. Not because of stunning beauty but sheer ugliness. A fashion designer once said about the wrong people wearing miniskirts: "Never has so little been raised so much to show too much that should not be shown." You probably know where this is going to...
That said, while driving home, I stopped at a four-way stop on Naismith by Robinson and Allen Fieldhouse. The usual parade of females exhibiting their warm-weather "wardrobe" (if it can be called that) was crossing the street. Not too bad. Then along came a female with more rolls than a bakery wearing a halter top and I believe, short-shorts. Not a pretty sight. Certain people should not wear tight-fitting clothes or clothing that exposes large amounts of flesh. I know that it was eighty-something today, but that wasn't exactly the best thing for her to wear or for anyone to see. Nobody wants to see that. I'm not the most fashionable person, but I know what clothing I should wear as not to offend people with sights they do not want to particularly look at or cause people to want to shut their eyes and vomit.
At that moment, I kind of wished that the weather wasn't so warm. Either that or this person wore some more flattering clothing. Whoever came up with the maxim of "Don't judge a person by their cover" must have been deluding themself. They probably saw stuff they didn't want to see.
That's all for now.
Monday, April 17, 2006
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the kind-of-regularly-updated site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for one of those updates. If you were looking for some other site, then please click on the "Back" button on your web browser.
Some days, I feel like I can't express what I am feeling without going off the deep end and making comments that place me into the zone of social awkwardness. The point of no return where you can't go back in time and take back what you said. The instandt conversation-killing stuff. Sort of like setting yourself on fire and letting everyone see yourself burn. Guilty on all charges. It's either that or mumbling out incoherent phrases that make me look like a total moron. Some days I just wish I could be brilliant and not so much a total fool.
And so, fragments from songs that best explain what I was going to say about myself wihtout the social awkwardness of me trying to explain it myself. Extra credit if you can figure out the name and artist.
Oh-oh, yes I’m the great pretender
Adrift in a world of my own
In the real world
There are things that we can’t change
And endings come to us
In ways that we can’t rearrange
Listened long, tried to take it in
All these facts leave me in the swim
It’s down and down there is no up
I think that I’ve run out of luck.
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them saying
And it gets better every day
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
Tomorrow’s just another... day
Oh I’m never speaking up again.
Starting now
One more thing.
Why is it my fault?
So maybe I try too hard
But it’s all because of this desire
I just wanna be liked, I just wanna be funny.
Looks like the jokes on me
So call me captain backfire
I’m never speaking up again it only hurts me.
I’d rather be a mystery than she desert me.
Oh I’m never speaking up again
Starting now
Out of the darkness, into the light
Leaving the scene of the crime
Either I’m wrong or I’m perfectly right every time
Sometimes I lie awake, night after night
Coming apart at the seams
Eager to please, ready to fight
Why do I go to extremes?
Darling I don’t know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low there ain’t no in-betweens
And if I stand or I fall
It’s all or nothing at all
Darling I don’t know why I go to extremes
That's all for now.
Some days, I feel like I can't express what I am feeling without going off the deep end and making comments that place me into the zone of social awkwardness. The point of no return where you can't go back in time and take back what you said. The instandt conversation-killing stuff. Sort of like setting yourself on fire and letting everyone see yourself burn. Guilty on all charges. It's either that or mumbling out incoherent phrases that make me look like a total moron. Some days I just wish I could be brilliant and not so much a total fool.
And so, fragments from songs that best explain what I was going to say about myself wihtout the social awkwardness of me trying to explain it myself. Extra credit if you can figure out the name and artist.
Oh-oh, yes I’m the great pretender
Adrift in a world of my own
In the real world
There are things that we can’t change
And endings come to us
In ways that we can’t rearrange
Listened long, tried to take it in
All these facts leave me in the swim
It’s down and down there is no up
I think that I’ve run out of luck.
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
I hear them saying
And it gets better every day
I hear them saying
Tomorrow’s just another day
Tomorrow’s just another... day
Oh I’m never speaking up again.
Starting now
One more thing.
Why is it my fault?
So maybe I try too hard
But it’s all because of this desire
I just wanna be liked, I just wanna be funny.
Looks like the jokes on me
So call me captain backfire
I’m never speaking up again it only hurts me.
I’d rather be a mystery than she desert me.
Oh I’m never speaking up again
Starting now
Out of the darkness, into the light
Leaving the scene of the crime
Either I’m wrong or I’m perfectly right every time
Sometimes I lie awake, night after night
Coming apart at the seams
Eager to please, ready to fight
Why do I go to extremes?
Darling I don’t know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low there ain’t no in-betweens
And if I stand or I fall
It’s all or nothing at all
Darling I don’t know why I go to extremes
That's all for now.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Statcounter
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only site on the Internet that is devoted to all things related to Un. It's also updated every so often to keep it current.
It's been a very nice week of weather out in this part of the world, Lawrence, KS. Warm, sunny, a little windy, but wonderful weather to sit outside. Spending a lot of time inside the law school is not healthy or very fun. Yes, I could use the computers or read a newspaper or something like that, but sometimes, you just got to go outside for a few moments. At least my International Economic Law and Development professor recognized this scientifically recognized fact. We had class outside today. Very nice.
Anyways, if you haven't noticed already, I have a counter on the bottom of this webpage run by a marvelous webiste called StatCounter. It seems a little Orwellian, but it's pretty interesting to see who comes to this site and where they come from and how they got to this little piece of property on the Information Superhighway. I've looked at this information and well, some of it is pretty interesting...put in the most carefully crafted language possible.
Well, for instance, I've had visitors stumbling in from various countries like Malaysia, Bulgaria, the UK, Israel, Italy and Malta. Which isn't such a bad mix of people from around the world. Though I wonder why anyone from Bulgaria would want to come here. Not that I have top-secret information on this site...just the random ramblings of a KU Law student.
I can understand people coming to this site from other blogs like the Kansas Law Student or Tony's Kansas City. If you're coming from SBC Broadband or even the local university, that's understandable. But if you're from the Department of Health and Human Services and you're doing a search on how terrorists can exploit a hurricane, my blog necessarily isn't the best source of information. Try FAS or some other website. Please, it will be a much better way of keeping your job duty of keeping America safe.
I have to admit that some of the searches that led people here were a little strange. I guess the search engine algorithm works differently than I thought. Why the user chooses this site instead of something else, that's a different thing. The search terms they used, well, some of them defy description. A small listing of phrases that got people here:
"paperclip crossbow"
"its the media fault"
"terrorists exploit a hurricane"
"quinn snyder cocaine"
"act like a ninja day"
"hillmon humor"
"breaking into a million little pieces lyrics"
"towel folding funny story"
Apparently, someone from the University of Michigan is interested in finding out more about a certain person attending KU Law. This person's name shall go unidentified. His identity (not me) shall be kept secret and not posted on this blog. If you meet me, I might tell you some salient clues and have you guess from there. It shouldn't be too hard to guess who this person is, as they have a well-known trait/characteristic/habit.
That's all for now.
It's been a very nice week of weather out in this part of the world, Lawrence, KS. Warm, sunny, a little windy, but wonderful weather to sit outside. Spending a lot of time inside the law school is not healthy or very fun. Yes, I could use the computers or read a newspaper or something like that, but sometimes, you just got to go outside for a few moments. At least my International Economic Law and Development professor recognized this scientifically recognized fact. We had class outside today. Very nice.
Anyways, if you haven't noticed already, I have a counter on the bottom of this webpage run by a marvelous webiste called StatCounter. It seems a little Orwellian, but it's pretty interesting to see who comes to this site and where they come from and how they got to this little piece of property on the Information Superhighway. I've looked at this information and well, some of it is pretty interesting...put in the most carefully crafted language possible.
Well, for instance, I've had visitors stumbling in from various countries like Malaysia, Bulgaria, the UK, Israel, Italy and Malta. Which isn't such a bad mix of people from around the world. Though I wonder why anyone from Bulgaria would want to come here. Not that I have top-secret information on this site...just the random ramblings of a KU Law student.
I can understand people coming to this site from other blogs like the Kansas Law Student or Tony's Kansas City. If you're coming from SBC Broadband or even the local university, that's understandable. But if you're from the Department of Health and Human Services and you're doing a search on how terrorists can exploit a hurricane, my blog necessarily isn't the best source of information. Try FAS or some other website. Please, it will be a much better way of keeping your job duty of keeping America safe.
I have to admit that some of the searches that led people here were a little strange. I guess the search engine algorithm works differently than I thought. Why the user chooses this site instead of something else, that's a different thing. The search terms they used, well, some of them defy description. A small listing of phrases that got people here:
"paperclip crossbow"
"its the media fault"
"terrorists exploit a hurricane"
"quinn snyder cocaine"
"act like a ninja day"
"hillmon humor"
"breaking into a million little pieces lyrics"
"towel folding funny story"
Apparently, someone from the University of Michigan is interested in finding out more about a certain person attending KU Law. This person's name shall go unidentified. His identity (not me) shall be kept secret and not posted on this blog. If you meet me, I might tell you some salient clues and have you guess from there. It shouldn't be too hard to guess who this person is, as they have a well-known trait/characteristic/habit.
That's all for now.
Monday, April 10, 2006
Another Update
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the semi-irregularly updated site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for one of those semi-irregular updates. It's another post on this blog. I'm going to hit two-hundred posts.
I went to the public library on Saturday and got some(a very loose term) books during their book giveaway. Yes, I have no real social life per se and I like books a lot. But you probably don't want to read about this mundane stuff going on in my life. On to other stuff. Though I have to admit that some psychologists have a strange sense of humor. I would have never guessed that one can poke fun at vegetarians so well...
This is quite possibly, one of the more obvious stories coming from Louisiana. People are sending a lot of complaints to the the state board regulating contractors. Nearly 60,000 of them every month. Which reminds me of a joke involving contractors. Which I will not mention here, but the punchline involves their propensity to give nothing but estimates.
Something interesting for all those people who are interested in dialects and American English. Basically, those people who like knowing where people say certain things, like "What do you call a long sandwich containing cold cuts, lettuce, and so on?" I'm one of those people and well, here's a handy site that examines these questions and places results on maps.
And some research that shows that some people have too much time on their hands. Or a fascination with Kylie Minogue. I'm not sure what to make of it, but I think the scientist who came up with this had more than time on his hands. Only an Englishman would do research like this.
And yet more research that shows people have too much time on their hands. Something Easter-related in a morbid way. Scientists debating on how the Romans crucified people during Biblical times. It doesn't really matter how it was done, but who it got done to. No matter how it was done, it was a painful way to die.
That's all for now.
I went to the public library on Saturday and got some(a very loose term) books during their book giveaway. Yes, I have no real social life per se and I like books a lot. But you probably don't want to read about this mundane stuff going on in my life. On to other stuff. Though I have to admit that some psychologists have a strange sense of humor. I would have never guessed that one can poke fun at vegetarians so well...
This is quite possibly, one of the more obvious stories coming from Louisiana. People are sending a lot of complaints to the the state board regulating contractors. Nearly 60,000 of them every month. Which reminds me of a joke involving contractors. Which I will not mention here, but the punchline involves their propensity to give nothing but estimates.
Something interesting for all those people who are interested in dialects and American English. Basically, those people who like knowing where people say certain things, like "What do you call a long sandwich containing cold cuts, lettuce, and so on?" I'm one of those people and well, here's a handy site that examines these questions and places results on maps.
And some research that shows that some people have too much time on their hands. Or a fascination with Kylie Minogue. I'm not sure what to make of it, but I think the scientist who came up with this had more than time on his hands. Only an Englishman would do research like this.
And yet more research that shows people have too much time on their hands. Something Easter-related in a morbid way. Scientists debating on how the Romans crucified people during Biblical times. It doesn't really matter how it was done, but who it got done to. No matter how it was done, it was a painful way to die.
That's all for now.
Monday, April 03, 2006
NCAA and Opening Day
Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only known site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. OK, so I haven't exactly checked, but at last count, there was only one site and this is it. Deal with it or make up one.
It's the championship game for Men's March Madness and it's between UCLA and Florida. Both teams are very talented, but I'm thinking that UCLA will win a close one. By close, I mean three points or less. Yes, UCLA isn't the most offensive-minded team, but they have a very good defense. They shut down LSU's Big Baby. Then again, Florida's Noah, in my opinion, is a totally different animal. UCLA, I think, with their perimiter defense will push Florida's guards way past the three-point line and might force Florida to take a couple forced shots. What bothers me about UCLA is their propensity for turnovers. That might hurt them if the game gets into trading-shots mode.
I'm thinking the following score:
UCLA: 63
Florida: 61
The Royals begin their season with a game against Detroit. Interestingly enough, the big (and I mean big--$500 million dollars at stake) stadium improvement vote is coming up tomorrow. As much as I like watching Chiefs football and Royals baseball, I doubt that the new sliding roof will make Kansas City a "big league" city by any stretch of the imagination.
The only thing that is "big league" about the Royals is the number of losses they've had. It's like seeing a Kansas weather forecast in the middle of July. Several years of triple digits and we aren't talking about the win column. And the Chiefs aren't exactly "big league" either. Their defense is aggressive but it has more holes than a Dick Cheney hunting victim. They have great potential, but aren't exactly living up to it. They don't make it to the playoffs due to clutching defeat out of the jaws of victory.
The Chiefs were nearly 20 million over the salary cap and they still can't make it to the playoffs. Their defense still sucks, despite having a few moments of brilliance. The Royals won't spend serious money to get players with proven talent. When they do get great players like Johnny Damon, Jermaine Dye, and a list of others, they trade them off since someone doesn't want to pay more money. What happens? They play for teams that win World Series(Damon and the Red Sox, now with the Yankees) or teams that can legitimately compete in the postseason. The Royals, quite possibly, is the best place in the league to develop talent and sell it off for cut-rate prices.
If the Chiefs can pay that much for that much mediocre talent and the Royals have saves millions by selling off real talent, one would think that they would have enough money to chip in a little more for the stadiums. And the owners use scare tactics(if you don't pay up, we'll leave to a richer city) to drum up support for a roof that looks like a giant Pringles potato chip on wheels.
The incentives for this new rolling roof are what? KC might get to host the All-Star Game, a possible Super Bowl, and if the Sprint Center and the improvements are made, a possible Final Four in 2013. That's assuming the city sewers are still working by 2013, as it will cost nearly $1 billion to fix that little problem and that will most likely be another tax increase.
So, cheers to Kansas City, a place with ill-placed priorities. Heres to a city that is willing to shoulder over $600 million dollars for an upside-down punch bowl Sprint Arena and stadium improvements for two exceptionally mediocre teams that use scare tactics to drum up support for a sales tax. And a final hurrah for a city that considers sports more important than minor details like a working sewer system instead of the current one using pipes laid down in the US Civil War. Not that a functioning sewer syster really matters anyways. Who doesn't like ruptured pipes shooting out geysers of filthy water?
When Kansas City host these events (assuming they do), let's hope the event aren't marred by stories of ruptured pipes spewing out geysers of filthy waste water or even clean water for that matter. Then again, it would be fitting, as Kansas City is the self-proclaimed City of Fountains.
That's all for now.
It's the championship game for Men's March Madness and it's between UCLA and Florida. Both teams are very talented, but I'm thinking that UCLA will win a close one. By close, I mean three points or less. Yes, UCLA isn't the most offensive-minded team, but they have a very good defense. They shut down LSU's Big Baby. Then again, Florida's Noah, in my opinion, is a totally different animal. UCLA, I think, with their perimiter defense will push Florida's guards way past the three-point line and might force Florida to take a couple forced shots. What bothers me about UCLA is their propensity for turnovers. That might hurt them if the game gets into trading-shots mode.
I'm thinking the following score:
UCLA: 63
Florida: 61
The Royals begin their season with a game against Detroit. Interestingly enough, the big (and I mean big--$500 million dollars at stake) stadium improvement vote is coming up tomorrow. As much as I like watching Chiefs football and Royals baseball, I doubt that the new sliding roof will make Kansas City a "big league" city by any stretch of the imagination.
The only thing that is "big league" about the Royals is the number of losses they've had. It's like seeing a Kansas weather forecast in the middle of July. Several years of triple digits and we aren't talking about the win column. And the Chiefs aren't exactly "big league" either. Their defense is aggressive but it has more holes than a Dick Cheney hunting victim. They have great potential, but aren't exactly living up to it. They don't make it to the playoffs due to clutching defeat out of the jaws of victory.
The Chiefs were nearly 20 million over the salary cap and they still can't make it to the playoffs. Their defense still sucks, despite having a few moments of brilliance. The Royals won't spend serious money to get players with proven talent. When they do get great players like Johnny Damon, Jermaine Dye, and a list of others, they trade them off since someone doesn't want to pay more money. What happens? They play for teams that win World Series(Damon and the Red Sox, now with the Yankees) or teams that can legitimately compete in the postseason. The Royals, quite possibly, is the best place in the league to develop talent and sell it off for cut-rate prices.
If the Chiefs can pay that much for that much mediocre talent and the Royals have saves millions by selling off real talent, one would think that they would have enough money to chip in a little more for the stadiums. And the owners use scare tactics(if you don't pay up, we'll leave to a richer city) to drum up support for a roof that looks like a giant Pringles potato chip on wheels.
The incentives for this new rolling roof are what? KC might get to host the All-Star Game, a possible Super Bowl, and if the Sprint Center and the improvements are made, a possible Final Four in 2013. That's assuming the city sewers are still working by 2013, as it will cost nearly $1 billion to fix that little problem and that will most likely be another tax increase.
So, cheers to Kansas City, a place with ill-placed priorities. Heres to a city that is willing to shoulder over $600 million dollars for an upside-down punch bowl Sprint Arena and stadium improvements for two exceptionally mediocre teams that use scare tactics to drum up support for a sales tax. And a final hurrah for a city that considers sports more important than minor details like a working sewer system instead of the current one using pipes laid down in the US Civil War. Not that a functioning sewer syster really matters anyways. Who doesn't like ruptured pipes shooting out geysers of filthy water?
When Kansas City host these events (assuming they do), let's hope the event aren't marred by stories of ruptured pipes spewing out geysers of filthy waste water or even clean water for that matter. Then again, it would be fitting, as Kansas City is the self-proclaimed City of Fountains.
That's all for now.
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