Musings on Hair

Greetings and welcome to the Un-Zone, the official site of all things Un. Not only is this the official site, but it is the only site. This post is brought to you by the letter "H" and the irrational number "pi," a number I know to the 100th decimal. I'm feeling pretty good today. I slacked around, watched some TV, read some good books, and got a hair cut. Ah...today's post is all about hair.

My hair is something that defies description. When it is cut short, it behaves like normal hair, although it possesses a texture that some people find, well, interesting. This girl I know at KU Law rubbed my head and gave me the nickname of "Fuzzy Bear." This is due to my hair. For some reason, she must give everyone she knows a CB radio name. Why, I have no clue. It's just weird.
When it is long, my hair exhibits odd properties. It defies the laws of nature and accurate description. Yes, I did grow my hair long. I once grew it so long that you could not see my eyes when I combed my hair down. Ah...combing my hair down. Damn near impossible. I woke up every morning with a case of bed-head that would make Don King's hair pale in comparison. You could literally stick a comb in there and it would stay in place. Birds had the odd notion my hair was a nest. They would land or climb onto my head and sit there. Someone once described the texture as shag carpet. Which perked the interest of a girl standing next to me. She had to make sure the description was accurate. Honest to God, she said, "You're right! It does feel like shag carpet!" She had the oddest look on her face when she felt my hair.

There's something magical about the power of hair. There's also something quite sexual about hair. It shows who we are and a little bit about our values. We spend large amounts of time looking at hair, commenting on hair, touching hair (on ourselves and other people), and grooming hair. We can't stop noticing other peoples and our own hair. We find hair attractive. It's biologically hard-wired into our brains. We can't stop our passion for hair. The cingulate gyrus is the section of our brain that controls grooming, nuzzling, and cuddle cues, as well as our impulse for maternal caring. It mediates our nonverbal cues for those whom we care and truly care for. This includes sexual behaviors like flirting.
Have you ever noticed that if you like a person, you just want to run your fingers through their hair? Assuming they have hair and it is of sufficient length and some other factors that determine whether or not you want to pursue such activity. Especially if you are a guy and you like a girl? There's nothing like that feeling. Soft, silky, shiny, glowing tresses. Straight, curly, wavy, it doesn't matter. You brush the hair away from the face. You run your fingers through. How your fingers linger and you don't want to stop. The indescribable tactile sensations. The scalp rub. That warm, tingling feeling. Mmm... Sorry. Got carried away.
Or if you are a girl and you like someone, you do the little hair flip or you run your fingers through your hair. The come-hither look. You might not notice when you do these actions, but you do this every single time. It's noted in every single body language book ever published. And it works every time. It gets them going. It is the most effective nonverbal cue a woman can ever use.
In either case, it's your cingulate gyrus working. You can't stop it form working. It will do what it feels it is natural. All mammals have it hard-wired into them. We will cuddle, groom, and show signs of affection for all eternity or at least until we evolve and find such things unnecessary, which at this moment, is highly unlikely.

Ahh...the power of hair. That's all for now.