Thursday, March 29, 2007

I Just Said That...?

Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only known site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for an update to this site, as it's been a long while since I've posted one.

I've always considered myself to be a not-so-great public speaker. It's something that does not come naturally to me. The only way that I can do well with public speaking, so it seems, is by writing it down and going over it over and over again. And yet, all of my experiences in law school seem to go against what I've always considered to be true.
In my 1L year, I had to take Lawyering, one of the most God-awful classes ever. Perfectly and utterly boring and useless. Every law school professor I've talked to considers that class to be overly academic and not based upon reality. People I know who are in the Defender Project and Legal Aid talk about how on the first day, they are told to forget everything they've learned in Lawyering.
The same applies with Trial Advocacy as the authors of the textbook are not really lawyers. They have no idea of what it's like to be in an actual trial, but base their book upon social science and not on real trial experience. Sure, they might ask some lawyers, but it's pure academic bullshit. This is another problem with the law school education.
Anyways, in Lawyering II, you have to do oral aguments. I really didn't type anything out, which normally would have doomed me. I just made a quick outline and modified it as the oral arguments proceeded. And when it was my turn to speak, I winged it. Absolutely winged it and went on gut instinct. And I did amazingly well. So well that the professor grading my performance said that it was one of the best he had seen.
And in Trial Advocacy, the Judge who was grading my performance, an actual judge with experience, said that I did a mighty persuasive performance. Again, I just winged it. I did what I thought, instinctually, would work. It was a great performance, though the jury didn't think so for some reason. I guess that it might have been due to them not paying much attention and automatically thinking my client was guilty.
Same thing in Advanced Litigation. I don't really write my closing/opening argument word for word, but come up with a basic outline. They come out in perfect order and they combine precise logic with emotional appeal. And I have not practiced it in any way. I just say what I want to say.

Yesterday, I was arguing a case in Advanced Litigation involving a car accident. Since I was representing the plaintiff, I was arguing that my client was hit by a drunk driver travelling at 60MPH in a 30 MPH zone. In addition, the drunk driver borrowed the car from his next door neighbor and the neighbor knew about this person's bad driving record. A simple case of negligent entrustment.
I forgot that the case what that night, so I really didn't prepare that well. Despite my failure to prepare, I somehow manage to spot every single issue except for two, as well as make coherent arguments. The two I missed, I should have known. One was a prior conviction and the other was improper use of circumstancial character evidence.
I did manage to exclude a very important piece of evidence in a police report. The cop at the accident scene came to the conclusion that my client failed to make a complete stop. If it had gotten in, it was game over for my client. It somehow popped into my head to exclude that little piece of evidence.

Which brings me to an interesting question. Am I setting myself short on my speaking abilities, let alone my thinking skills as a lawyer? I'm beginning to think that I probably am selling myself short. Or I was using a wrong method of preparing myself. Maybe it's a bit of both. Or I'm thinking myself into failure and making a self-fulfilling prophesy.
I never considered myself to be much of a trial lawyer who speaks in front of the court. My experiences in Advanced Litigation are making me reconsider this notion. I just might be a brilliant issue spotter.

Well. it's time to get back to writing a research paper. Man, how I hate that paper with utter vehemence. I should have fulfilled my writing requirement much earlier and not have waited until the final semester of law school.


That's all for now.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

A Spring Break Update

Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only known site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. Basically, this means all the random stuff that the author of this blog finds interesting. It's spring break and this means that I am kind of on vacation from that minor Circle of Hell in life called law school.

Ah...there's nothing like Spring Break. It's a nice break from law school or any kind of school for that matter. It's even better since it coincides with the period of inactivity called March Madness. As a men's college basketball fan (not overly obsessed, thankfully), March Madness is a wonderful time of the year, even if my favorite team is losing (Rock Chalk Jayhawk). Well, I wouldn't go that far. I still get angry when the Jayhawks choke or when the Jayhawks lose. I'm not going to act like some nutjob and act psycho about it. They lose, they lose. They win, they win. Jayhawk basketball. They're doing pretty well this season. At least they didn't choke in the first round as a #1 seed. If that happened, Coach Self would need to find a new place to live in. That's the polite way of saying that he would be a persona non grata in Lawrence, KS.
This year, I'm expecting at least a Final Four. Southern Illinois is an excellent defense-minded team, but I doubt their offense has enough firepower to counter the Jayhawks. If the game turns out to be a run-and-gun down the court, Southern Illinois will have some problems. The Jayhawks can rotate and replace guys and not suffer too much when it comes to offense or defense.
If it turns out to be a KU-UCLA Regional Final, I'm not worried either. UCLA is a good team, but after seeing the Indiana-UCLA game, they're not that scary. Texas with Kevin Durant is much scarier. But I might have to temper that statement just a bit. Texas plain stunk against USC. UCLA can match up against Kansas but I give the edge to Kansas. I'm just biased towards Kansas...OK?

I also saw 300. As an action movie, it's great. Lots of fighting. Lots of blood. Like watching the most hyper, balls-to-the-wall fighting game. Stilted and not-so-great dialogue. The score is not John Williams material, but it works well for what the movie is.
For those who do not know, 300 is based upon a graphic novel (codeword for comic book) based upon the historic battle of Thermopylae, where the Spartans and their allies--300 Spartans and 700 from a place called Thespiae (no relation to the Greek word for actors)--valiantly fought to the last man against the mighty Persian army led by Xerxes. I shall not bore you with the historical details, as they can be easily found on Google, but to make a long story short, someone betrays the Greeks and they all die. A year later, at the battle of Platea, the Greeks rout the Persians. Then comes the bitter war between Athens and Sparta. And the rest, as they say, is ancient Greek history...
Many have complained that the movie has numerous faults. Bad dialogue. Humdrum music. The lack of historical accuracy. Guilty on all charges. Sure, the dialogue was bad, one dimensional, gallows humor. Last time I checked, in real life, short and pithy is how they communicated in battle. Nobody busted out a Shakespearean speech while people are getting sliced and diced to pieces. It was "Man the torpedoes" or "Shoot the #%**!" And soldiers are known for their gallows humor. M*A*S*H made the best of it and few people complained. Hell, the theme to M*A*S*H was called "Suicide is Painless."
The lack of historical accuracy. Blatantly inaccurate. No giant monsters or ogres in Persia, despite what the movie shows. Costumes were totally wrong. The events were wrong as well. And the real life Spartans did not wear the homoerotic/women turn-on battle dress that the Spartans wore in this movie. The movie Spartans are muscle men who wear nothing more than Speedo-like briefs, a cape, a helmet, a shield, and a sword. Now you get it? I digress. But 300 is a movie that never billed itself as historically accurate, let alone, accurate. It was meant to be a retelling of a historical event in a entertaining way.
The music. Not John Williams in the least. No Star Wars fanfare, but repetitive power chords, frentic slapdash, hypnotic rhythms. This movie is about fighting, remember? And the fights become eerily engrossing when the music is going.
Despite all of its flaws, 300 is an entertainingly bloody way to spend 2 hours of one's time. If the fighting is not your fare, there are other movies to watch...like Road Hogs. Yup, nothing like seeing fat, overweight, middle-aged men in black leather.


That's all for now.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

A Two For One Deal: Riverdance and Fred Phelps

Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only known site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. Basically, it's all about me. It's time for an update to this site because I know that you all want to get a look into my so-called life and have a few laughs about how it is terribly lacking. Anyways...

I'm a person with a taste taht for most people, is not very fashionable or trendy. I don't watch the in shows like Desperate Houswives, American Idol, or any other mega hit on TV. Shows that get rave reviews are not on my radar. I don't read the books that are the must-read fiction best sellers. My tastes, to sound a little elitist, are not what you might consider are for the masses.
I like classical music. There's nothing better than listening to a symphony by Beethoven or a little sonata by Mozart. I can probably rattle off operatic scores better than I can rattle off pop songs. I've never gotten why people like certain artists when their songs are...well...lacking any real merit when it comes to harmony or lyrics. I sometimes long for the days when singers could actually sing a tune without resorting to tawdry computer effects and other means of digital modification.
As much as I enjoy my quasi-elitist, quite possibly snobbish tastes, I do enjoy the commercial stuff and the TV opiate of the masses. I get a big kick out of watching the Jerry Springer show and I find myself strangely glued to the set when Maury Povich does "Who's the Daddy" episodes. I freely admit to enjoying these shows.
I also like Riverdance...the spectacle of Irish step dancing that has been going strong for over a decade. Well over 9,000 performances in over 30 countries. Nearly 19 million people watching this production. One could easily say that this show is something for the masses, as well as a staple for public television. It can be said that public television spread the phenomenon across the United States. This led to Lord of the Dance, another Irish step dancing show.
So when Riverdance was coming to the Lied Center, it was something that I could not miss. And put simply, I enjoyed the show. Every single minute of it.

Lots of Irish step dancing defined by fancy foot work, quick tapping, and smooth gliding. The amount of energy used to keep the upper body rigid the entire time. The grace and elegance combined with sheer power.
There was some other forms of dance involved with this show. Some sultry flamenco expertly done. As well as an entertaining "dance off" between American tap dance and Irish step dancing, which was a crowd pleaser. Energetic. One can only wonder what it might have been like if Savion Glover and Michael Flatley were doing this number...
One of the musicians decided to sneak in a little "I'm a Jayhawk" into the program. When a musician can play a song about the spring and segue right into the KU fight song, that's great. Rock Chalk indeed. The singing was great. The lead singer for "Heal Their Hearts--Freedom" had a booming, powerful baritone. Brought the house down. The other singers were just as skillful. All in all, it was a most excellent show.
Yes, Riverdance has been around for a while, but it's still entertaining none the less. I wasn't going to let Fred Phelps and his gang of loonies get in the way.

Oh...Fred Phelps. Forgot about him. Before the performance, his family decided to protest at the Lied Center. I'm what you may call a forgiving person, someone who tries to be as tolerant as possible, but I seriously wish there is a spot reserved for Fred Phelps and others like him in the deepest parts of Hell. I wish he and the rest of his kind were dead and they didn't exist. He gives the state of Kansas a bad name. The State School Board of Education, for a while, did that job pretty well. Adding Fred Phelps to the mix just makes it even worse.
All those protesters were singing a version of "God Hates America" complete with references to IEDs, perverts, and hating gays. I think that the Taliban and Al Qaeda might have some spots in their membership, but they might consider the Phelps clan too crazy. Note to the government: I am not a terrorist. Seriously.
I'm thinking that Fred Phelps and his clan are secretly closet homosexuals who are doing the homosexual bashing to make themselves feel better. It's the only reason I can think of why they're doing this. I feel bad when I think this as it's an insult to gays and lesbians to put them in the same group as Fred Phelps. And to think Fred Phelps used to be a civil rights attorney (the painful irony in this comment). I should know this as one of my professors used to know Phelps when Phelps was an attorney. This also reflects badly on the legal profession, so I would like to add in that Fred Phelps was disbarred...thankfully. Now his daughter is continuing the tradition of gay bashing and making legal arguments in front of the court as to why the government should not ban their hate speech.
I feel sorry for all the police who have to watch over these nutjobs. These police officers deserve a raise or bonus or something...
And to think that the Phelps clan will be at the Law School graduation ceremony in May. Oh boy. Another dose of those wackos.
So, in sum, I had a lovely time at Riverdance despite the appearance of the Phelps clan. I got a two for one deal with the entertainment, though the entertainment brought by the Phelps clan was entertainment I did not need or want at all.

That's all for now.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Stand Up

Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the only site on the Internet devoted to all things related to Un. It's time for an update, something I have not done lately to this site. So you will get an update today.

If you are a regular reader of this site, you will know that I do stand up comedy on a semi-quasi-regular basis. It's generally done on Wednesday nights when the Student Union Activities people have their somewhat regular stand up comedy competitions. It's pretty fun and amusing to see people go up on stage and make fools of themselves, myself included.
In addition, if you are a regular reader of this site, you will know that I have a long history of getting fourth place whenever I do one of these events. It, for some reason, is a running joke being played on me by some higher power. Or an elaborate plot made by aliens. Or it is my fate to be Number Four. I sometimes joke with Bryan that I'm going to get fourth place when there are only three people competing.

So I compete last night at SUA's Stand Up Stand Off. The MC is a pretty hilarious guy named Roy Wood, a man who does prank calls, stand-up comedy, and a lot of other funny stuff. He did a great job of being the MC and his jokes were funny. His best ones were about college and his advice to women.
I'm the first one up and I do my little number. For those who do not know what I perform, I do obserational humor about race, current events, and the little things in life that I find interesting like Gary Lezac is crazy, which is the truth. If you name your dogs after the weather and you punctuate the weather forecast with spastic arm and hand movements, you're most likely crazy...or a little too enthusiastic about the weather. One can only go too far with one's excitement over a topic before it gets to be troublesome. A lot of what I do is edgy and most definitely, politically incorrect. It involves quite a bit of anger and sarcasm. If its possible, I also throw in impressions of famous people.
My set included the following list of topics (somewhat in order of appearance): Calculus, Guantanamo Bay, Gun, Jesse Jackson, Chinese food, homework, bad driving, racial profiling, sex, casinos, migrant workers, cost of college tuition, Apocalypse, End of the World, Gary Lezac's dogs, weather, Gary Lezac's weather forecast, Gary Lezac having sex, cigarette break, Woody Allen, adoption, more end of the world, online tests, dating life, dogs again, eating cats, why standup comedy is better than sex.
This was just a ten minute set and I probably could have done a lot more stuff, but getting all of that stuff in that amount of time isn't too bad. I could have added in the M&M joke, had I had more time.
The final results were that I did not get fourth place. I made it into the top three, thereby qualifying me for the Stand Up Stand Off finals, which will be held some time at the end of April, most likely the last Wednesday in April. I hope to do well and not be in fourth place. I would like to continue this tiny streak of top three into the Final Round competition and actually win a prize of some sort. This will be the only final that I will be interested in this semester.

That's all for now.