Stuff on the Web

Greetings and welcome back to The Un-Zone, the site for all things related to Un. It's time for yet another update. This time, weird and unusual stories found on the Internet.

The first item is something that only the Japanese could invent. Nine-bladed scissors. Yes, nine-bladed scissors. I'm not sure what to make out of this invention, but I believe that lots of people will get cut with them. And the amount of force needed to actually use them must be insane. Now you can make confetti the easy way. Though cutting along the dotted lines might be harder. Which blade to use and all.

Something you might not have figured out. Milk contains lactose and lactose intolerant people might be allergic to milk. And someone wants to sue milk manufacturers to post a warning label on milk to protect those who may not know they are lactose intolerant. And peanut butter contains peanuts, just so you know. And water may get clothes wet. Maybe the court can use the nine-bladed scissors to cut up the briefs while they are at it...just a suggestion.

And now, more political correctness so nobody feels left out. Just when you thought sports were safe from things like awards for everybody (think "Most Improved" which is a codeword for "You Sucked and you Still Do So We Came Up With This Lame Award To Give To You") no matter how little they participated or how badly they can't play the sport, they are now abolishing scores in youth sports events for kids under nine. Which is why they still have the scorekeeper and everybody still wins. Sorry, there are winners and losers in life and you can't always get what you want. Deal with it. That's how life operates when you're an adult. Just don't kill anyone later.

That's all for now.